When Music Becomes the Hero

I need… Something. Do you ever feel that way? Like, you need something to help alleviate all the negative feelings you’re feeling but you can’t channel it? You need something but you don’t know what?

This past week has been really rough. Both personally and worldly. I have witnessed Russia attack Ukraine - I wasn’t surprised by it at all, yet our leaders seemed to have been surprised. That is a little bit confusing and off-putting, to say the least.

Here at home in the U.S. I saw governors attack the LGBTQ+ community and the education system, which included attacking pretty much all minority groups through passing “Don’t Say Gay” laws, book banning, and prohibiting CRT and well, History.

All of these things hurt my brain to try to figure out the why, the how, and the WTF?

Then there is my personal life. I don’t lead an exciting life. I’m pretty average, to tell the truth. I’m pretty boring really. Yeah, I have a YouTube channel and I stream twice a week on Twitch. That’s the most exciting my life gets these days.

But March didn’t really start off very well.

I have needed to replace my wiper blades for a week now. I finally had the time and the means to do so when I entered an Auto Zone. Instead of getting help - and getting treated like a human being - I immediately felt unwelcome and the guy I went to for assistance talked down to me, rolling his eyes at my questions and eventually walked away from me.

Needless to say, I didn’t buy anything from that store. It was immediately apparent I was being judged just for being a woman daring to go into an auto parts store and asking for assistance. The guy clearly didn’t want to help me and it left me feeling pissed off but also (being honest here) demoralized and sad.

I just wanted some freakin’ wiper blades!

I don’t face sexism very often but when I do, it leaves me feeling like this pretty much every time. Then I immediately think of other minority groups in this country and how they are being attacked by our own government and I wonder, “Is this really necessary?” We live in the 21st century and we are still fighting the same battles older generations fought.

It’s Frustrating!

Then I think of Ukraine and how they are fighting for their freedom from a dictator who has clearly lost his ever-lovin' mind! I don’t understand the politics of all of this but I can’t help but feel like our leaders aren’t doing enough. But I also understand that it’s complicated.

BECAUSE IT'S ALWAYS COMPLICATED!

So I went to the bookstore yesterday. I needed to calm myself. I didn’t go there for any particular reason. I found myself drawn there. I bought some books and it helped. Then I bought iTunes cards and I knew exactly what I wanted…. MUSIC!

Specifically, Skillet. I bought a few other songs. Avril Lavigne has a new album and I bought that. I also bought some songs from Zayde Wolf, All Good Things, The Chainsmokers, Jimmy Eat World, and Creed.

But it’s Skillet that has my attention at the moment.

They dropped a new album and I’ve been listening to it on repeat.

With songs like Surviving the Game, that makes me think of Ukraine and what they’re going through right now. The lyrics say it all:

You can pretend You pretend that you're the one that can save me (save me)

Now I'm takin' it back, it was never yours (never yours)

I'm fightin'

Fightin' for my focus

Give the pain a purpose

Light the fire inside

Feel it come alive (come alive)

Show 'em what I'm made of

Victories for the brave ones

Who never bowed a knee

When it's do or die (do or die)

The whole song is like that. Ukraine is showing who they are - and they are like us. They are fighting what our ancestors fought for against England so long ago. We all have the desire for freedom and independence. We all have the desire to live our lives our way.

Skillet’s music has always inspired me. Even though I am agnostic and they are pretty much a Christian band, their words hit a chord with me that has nothing to do with religion. It’s the core of their music that inspires me. I relate to the lyrics.

I am a survivor. A fighter. Skillet’s music reminds me of this.

Another song that makes me think of what our own country is facing right now with the government attacks on abortion, history, books, and LGBTQ+ rights is a song called, Shout Your Freedom. Just read the lyrics:

You are a prisoner

Of what they wanted you to be

Now you're a minister

Of a brand new reality

Don't you want to get away

Shut down all the voices, all the white noises

Drowning in deeper waves

I gotta get away

They think they own you but they don't know

You've broken free, better on your own

You're on top of the world, at the top of your lungs

Come on, and shout your freedom

This is more of an aspiring type of song. We have to keep fighting - unfortunately. At the end of the day, we ALL want to be happy. We ALL deserve to be happy. So why is it that other people, leaders, in particular, keep stepping on us and trying to hold us back from achieving that? It doesn’t make sense to me.

And this is where music becomes our hero. Music reaches us. Across all walks of life. It inspires us, motivates us, mellows us. Music can do so many things for so many people.

So far, my favorite song on Skillet’s new album is Destiny. That one just gets me. It’s about making our own destiny, especially when it seems the world thinks our destiny is nothing but darkness. Just read some of the lyrics:

Is there a place where I

Could leave the world behind

And say goodbye to every painful memory

Where darkness ain't my destiny?

This is my destiny

This is my destiny

Is this the life that you want?

I don't ever wanna feel this way

'Cause this is the life that you got

And no one else can ever take your place

I can't (I can't), I won't (I won't)

Go down this road

It leaves me lost (I'm lost) alone (alone)

How did I get so far from home?

This is my song right here. As someone who has battled PTSD - my own personal demons from a traumatic past, it’s this right here! Can I just leave the world behind? For just a little while. I refuse to let Darkness be my Destiny! I refuse to let my own demons win! I won’t lose my soul. I will keep fighting, even when it seems so bleak that I can’t get out of bed. I will fight back my rage and anger, even when it seems like I can’t control it.

I WILL NOT BE AFRAID! I WILL NOT BREAK!

I WILL MAKE MY OWN DESTINY!

Thanks so much for reading!